Privacy Settings Pillows

The Future: "Sorry, but I have to show you an ad now."

The Anti-Agent

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

"The report is clear that cyber crime is on the increase, it's a worry."

'To most people, 1984 is just a novel; around here it's our instruction manual.'

Club Antisocial

"I need a deeper access to his brain. Only google has the records."

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

"They didn't want to be identified in my photo, so I blurred their butts."

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

'Due to government surveillance, is my allowance taxable?'

"I just found a unicorn! Apparently, they just want to be left alone."

March Against Big Tech: "Oh, wow, this has bee great for my step count!"

Next gen pregnancy tests.

'Now that everyone's street is online, we're mapping interiors.'

"We-your agents, successors, licensees, and assigns--would like to share a few thoughts with you."

"You work well without supervision? Fat chance of that happening in here!"

Privacy Conference Security

"Of course, if they ever start to suspect all their TVs are watching them back, we may have problems."

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

'Hey, what happened to my cookies?'

"Yes, I'm alone."

'It's a program on paranoia. Every time I leave the room, they stop and wait for me to come back.'

'More government surveillance!'

'To paraphrase Franklin Delano Roosevelt: The only thing we have to fear is the NSA, FBI, CIA, DEA, IRS, DIA, EPA, FTC, FCC...'

She required plenty of personal space.

"Don't deny it. You only wanted me for my metadata."

'To hear our privacy policy, please tell us you credit card and social security numbers...'

"I've added an additional response to the doc's health questionnaire. It's called 'Mind Your Own Business.'"

Clickbait

Hello from the shed.

CCTV in church.