Privacy Perfectionist Gifts

"I seem to have forgotten to opt out of Facebook being able to take my liver."

Club Antisocial

40 Days without an on-the-job conversation.

"Always remember, sweetheart, that when the service is free, YOU'RE the product!"

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"Various entrances to the gates of Hell."

Kid arrives with CCTV camera, saying: 'It followed me home, can we keep it?'

She required plenty of personal space.

Hello from the shed.

Bug Spray/Sun Screen

'We have some facts about you that you don't remember, some that you thought were really secret, and some that never even happened.'

"No, I'm still getting too much banjo."

"I said on the phone '2 percent.' I’m sure the NSA would back me up."

'Why worry about intrusive electronic surveillance. If you've done nothing wrong, you should have nothing to hide!'

"Fill out all these highly intrusive forms...we can't wait!"

'Never mind how accurate they are -- How DISCREET are they?'

A Failiure to Communicate

Computer spying.

Obama's surveillance of America.

"For future security questions, the name of your first pet should include a minimum of eight uppercase and lowercase letters, numbers and special characters."

"Good morning - your neighbours have asked me to come and tune your piano."

"The key to happiness is privacy. Hear what I'm sayin'?"

Nice Apology, Mark

Luxury Mini-Breaks For Parents

"You're V.P.N. says you're on another planet."

GDPR compliant

Reality TV, or state surveillance? The ultimate expression of a signature television genre, or the logical conclusion of anti-terrorism legislation? Dirk searched for clues but the boundaries had blurred. No one was talking...

"We need to be careful."

But It's So Easy

'Yes the business has become bigger, but Fred still likes to work at home.'

'As you all know, I've never been much of a 'people person'.'

"They were apparently more advanced than we thought."

Private Jet

"I wrote it, dear...the Great American Password."

"You know hell has a special place for those who stalk their kids online."