Prison Satire Aficionados Pillows

'Sorry, but none of our entrees are available for takeout.'

'Let's get a kitty.'

'No need to come in.. you can fax me your resume.'

"How'd you know I was in for cyber crime?"

'See, I told you it was a good idea to talk to the plants.'

Conrad Black will be unable to do his investment club's tax returns this year.

"This is why I don't want you doing our taxes anymore."

'Unfortunately The Hounds of The Baskerville were my role models.'

"Murder one. How about you?" "I tried to rob an arts and crafts store with a hot glue gun."

Prison baseball game features Bankers vs. Wall Street.

"They want to spend the weekend at Daddy's" (Colour)

'21 Today - he wants the key of the door...'

"Try and give me... happy."

'The SEC got me for inflating the numbers..'

Bullfighter and Bull Cellmates

'Thanks, that looks delicious, charge it to my room, would you?'

'Hey. You're back.'

'I'm in here for something I didn't do alright-I didn't pay my Council Tax!'

'So, how was your day?'

Exercise yard: 'It's windy this morning!' (Arrows on uniform all blowing away).

'It's amazing the change in his attitude since he took up knitting.'

'Jackie Chan caught you? Now, that's a coincidence - Charlie Chan caught me!'

"Ironically, I've got no bars."

'We've been married so long we finish each other's prison sentences.'

"Each time I was told to put myself in another man's shoes, I walk away in 'em."

"It's hard to believe you've served 14 years already for armed robbery. I lose all track of time when I'm shopping."

'Juries have never liked me.'

'Why can't you play harmonica like all the other inmates?'

When Financial Planners Go To Prison.

'The first time it was a fine. Second time, fine and probation. Third time...'

Listen. I'll change it in 30 - 60 days. Just use the yard until then.

I'll tell you what I most miss...being able to garrote people...

'Just like being in the Post Office!'

'This wine is made from fermented raisins by convicts in the state penitentiary...'

'I demand a new cellmate! -- that bum you put me with is a thief!'