Prison Aficionados Pillows

'Don't worry - You'll cross the pain threshold in a couple of years.'

'Let's get a kitty.'

'She's promised to wait for me but I only hope her memory isn't what it was!'

Ronnie 'the chameleon' waits for a break in the traffic, before making his break for it...

'That filet mignon was supposed to be your last meal? Whoops-a-daisy!'

"This is Cliff. He's a neo-con."

"No ham in this, I hope?"

"In the movie about the New York prison escapees, I'd like to see Jack Nicholson as Richard Matt and Woody Harrelson as David Sweat."

Prison bus - "Race you for a window seat."

"Sorry, you've got the wrong number."

Prisoner on the run - tread mill.

This gentleman would like to take his bird to see Alcatraz.

'Here comes the warden. Let's see you try to dance your way out of this one.'

'Sure, you can escape, but you never escape unscathed.'

Santa visits prison.

"Long story short, twenty minutes ago I wuz foolin' around on the prison computer... pressed the 'escape' key, and here I am!"

'Of course you can't remember what you had for breakfast -- we didn't HAVE any breakfast.'

FISH ESCAPE.

Prisoner playing golf with his ball and chains.

"It's hard to believe you've served 14 years already for armed robbery. I lose all track of time when I'm shopping."

'Hey, do mind swinging by my place to pick up my jail-jammies?'

It's stopped raining. I think I'll be going!

'One 10 by 8 for the wife, and a dozen postcard size for the rest of the gang...'

'What do you mean, the food is terrific?'

''I'm under house arrest for six months. It's a lot more fun if you're not already in jail for a bunch of other crimes.'

WARDEN, 'You're a bad influence around here, Murdock!'

'The Warden said you're to stop renting out the security video of your bank robbery.'

"It's like home from home in here. The rules and regulations are very similar."