Prince In Training Pillows

'When I grow up, Dad, I want to be just like you.'

Rap music

'Don't worry. I'm using carpet shampoo.'

'It's called a 'hat' -- you tip it to women instead of hitting them over the head with a club.'

"It's just - this McDonald's closes at midnight."

'I think the meeting went reasonably well until he threatened to call security.'

"There's a big difference between being a method actor and a meth OD'd actor, Burt."

"There's been a change in plans. Instead of Abilene, we're going to Camelot."

"What do you want to be for Halloween when you grow up?"

"I was assistant to Prince Andrew for six months, then I realised that, no matter how good I was, they were never going to make me Prince Andrew."

"Aren't you afraid you might get too smart?"

Pentagon Science Contest: 'I get that a lot...must be from being in the presence of raw genius.'

Easy shaving

Reading 'Levetation Magazine'.

'Your dog doesn't need medical help - But you do - He's a rabbit!!'

"Mommie!"

'To receive an application form, you have to fill out this application form.'

'I wish I had a horse.'

"Only when you master the Carry Forward Dedcution Defence will it be time for you to go."

"After the prince finds Cinderella, do they decided to drop out of royal family, like Prince Harry and Meghan?"

'Wow! This is the third restraining order this week! That's the last time I plan a family reunion.'

'Adult prodigy' "It's most extraordinary -and he's only 37."

'Ever since I started wearing this fake crown, lovely girls have kept coming up and kissing me...'

"This leaf tells me you are not ready to drive."

"Congratulations - you may already be King!"