Primitive Culture Comic Gifts

A caveman with a bow and arrow shoots at a cranky mammoth but points at his friend who is holding a spear.

The First Fire Stick

Primitive magician

"The invention of taxidermy."

Herding lava back to the fire pit.

The invention of the wheel and the axel.

Mammoth Posing

"When you grow up would you rather be a Hunter or Gatherer?"

'Another invention? -- You are SUCH a geek!'

I grew up vegetarian. Wow. That takes work to stay strong. What motivates you? Hey, lettuce brain! Peer pressure.

'Hey! -- what have you done with my invention?'

"He's got a man cave, a work cave, and a cave cave."

"The bad news is I didn't get any food. The good news is I got my 100,000 steps in."

Ape ambushes anteater hiding behind a monolith.

"It's a wheeble or some such thing, but still no sign of a deoderant."

"I think we should get a dog."

'Like heck he invented fire -- it was spontaneous combustion from the slob's trash pile.'

"Capture those magic moments forever with Kodak's new Stick of Charcoal."

"Do you think we could domesticate them?"

"I wish I had his I.Q.!"

"What am I supposed to to do? It's my hunter-gatherer instinct"

Early 3D home entertainment systems.

"It's a quaint, one room, no bath, no half-bath, no basement, no windows, hole-in-a-boulder studio."

"Man's first total solar eclipse"

'We've got food, shelter and clothing.. and now you want DISHES?'

A cave man blowing down a blowpipe.

'It's addicting... I watch it eight hours a day.'

"Well, well, would you look at that. Fire. Talk about living beyond your means."

'The trouble with being so primitive is that you have to say EVERYTHING in twenty-five words or less.'

"Honey, I'm homo erectus."

'Chuck, no! Keep circling. I love this part.'

"I don't get this! This app wants me to buy digital comic books!"

"You keep that up, and eventually the earth will be too warm

'Does it have any military applications?'

The First Tax Authorities. We only audit gatherers. Auditing hunters is too dangerous.