Price Slasher Gifts

"Your new spectacles will cost...."

Crazy Ed's Warehouse - body in freezer - "Nobody beats our prices and gets away with it."

"Jill Hamster's entrepreneurial disaster"

'It's amazing! I'm a magician! I can make a weekly wage disappear in four hours!'

'What do you do with the time you save?'

Prices Down!

"It was terrifying experience being faced with that kind of compulsive, insane behaviour...I tell you it's positively the last time I put foot in the sales!"

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

When Tia Carmen says... "I got it for a very good price!" it means...she stopped at a garage sale on the way home.

Do it! Go into the woods alone!...

Beef stew 50c. (In a bowl - $1.75)

'Congratulations, Forester. Your ingenious scheme to cut production costs ... In anticipation of this inevitable development, we are reducing your salary.'

The Horror Film Director.

"I see the businessman's lunch is up 50p."

Capitalism gone nuts!

Artist painting a cat.

'At least someone can afford to travel by train.'

Bureau of Inflation.

"Times are perfect for us masochists!..."

"Now, is this the kind of painting you mommy would be proud to post on her Instagram?"

"You can't beat the prices of these big box retailers."

Gas prices up.

'I can lend 100% on the new car, but only 70% on the tank of gas.'

One of the lesser known joys of being a fencing instructor.

"This coffee seems a little staler every morning, Edwina!"

'This could save us a bundle on electricity...by the way, Bob, how fast can you run?'

'I'm letting it lie fallow this year.'

"It's adjusted for inflation. A dollar a chip."

"Wow, you're dressed to kill."

'... So one day I thought, hey, why walk all the way out to the mound just to take a pitcher out of the game?'

"Yes, Madam, I know they were 78 p last week, but have you seen the price of oil?"

'Great work, Bigsley, on saving the company three hundred thousand on clysdale contract. Take the rest of the day off.'

"Builder's tea? Due to an unforeseen rise in material costs, that'll be £22.40."

'Why is it when they reduce the calories in a product, they always increase the price?'

(The Sharks: Cartoonist Gahan Wilson Nets a Fin-Filled School of Macabre sea Denizens.)