Presentation Day Gifts

"While you make the sales presentation, Monica. I'll scope out the room and try to identify this company's Achilles heel!"

"Nervous about this morning's presentation?"

'If I had to use one word to describe our strategy.'

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

'You forget, I'm a blackbelt in powerpoint.'

'And were there a point to your proposal, Henderson - What would it be?'

Tartine

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

"These projections don't make sparkles shoot out my ass."

"You're losing the audience. Switch to the Powerpoint presentation."

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'I have a plan 'B' but that's also dependent on a working projector bulb.'

'I'm Jeremy's father. I'm a computer consultant and I'm unemployed.'

Can't Do the Math/Won't Do the Math.

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

The wonderful world of cheese.

"The trend in tough economic times is to put off everything that doesn't require immediate action ? as this chart shows."

"I'm razzled, but not dazzled."

'That last meeting was a complete turn-off.'

"Any questions?"

"Hmmm ... that's interesting. Now, what about ideas that don't suck - do you have any of those?"

Lethal Presentation

'Now THAT'S a presentation! Great delivery, great graphics, and he moonwalks from the room.'

Billy, can you deliver your show 'n tell this time without the fog machine?

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

"A dozen eggs and a pint of semi-skimmed...Sorry, looks like I left my presentation in my other coat."

"I'll show you our growth projections but only if you promise not to snicker."

"Fantastic presentation! All of the investors loved it."

"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."

Yomp Foundation Presentation committee: 'Don't let the gong intimidate you!'

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

"Who wants to hear a funny story about the third quarter?"

"Any questions?"