Preparing For Exhibition T-Shirts

Artist's methods of guarding his paintings

"Hold it right there, ma'am! If you get too close to the artwork, I'll have to ask you to leave the gallery."

Party Animals.

"What the %@!!* is that?!" "Is that a leg? Wait—no, it's an arm. Wait—what?" "The frame is nice." "Whatever it is, it makes me miss Bob Ross." "Gasp!" "The intentionally lost Caravaggio"

"His mother had a great influence on him. She always made him eat his fruits and vegetables."

Well, you know these child prodigies - they can be very demanding about how their work is displayed.

Children's Art Show.

Cats at private view

"Swiping won't cut it sonny-boy, you have to physically walk to the next painting."

Trade Show Sherpas

A sign that reads "ART...and plenty of it!" hangs above the entrance to a museum.

Freaks of nature exhibit.

'We unfortunately had to compress our dinosaur area due to budget cuts. On the bright side, TyrannoTriStegoApatoHadroPlesioSaurodon Rex here is now the museum's most popular exhibit.'

Escher exhibition first floor

Anyone would think it's Frieze week...

Leaves falling out of a painting.

Private Viewing

"Typical venue, just providing male washroom facilities!"

Movie Monster Exhibit: Unavailable due to much needed repair work.

"Don't you find her work just so wonderfully liberating!"

"This piece resembles my subconscious desire to draw spirals on a big piece of paper."

Dogs looking at a fire hydrant in an art gallery.

Modern Portrait Gallery

'This statue is based on an earlier work of mine from the pre-kindergarten era.'

Metropolitan Art Center current exhibit: Father of the Finger-In-Your-Eye School of Modern Art.

"Someone switched off the freezer...it's melted."

"I don't dare take him near the De Kooning exhibit!"

"He had the Guggenheim in mind, I think."

In the art gallery

Leaking Hudson River paintings.

World Exhibition - At the Champs-Élysées - from 3 to 6 o'clock, great exhibition of petticoats

After three days the curator decided it was probably upside down.

Artist Retrospective.

'He hacked it off because the women in his weekly painting group never stopped gassing!'

"I get my best ideas in the shower."