Prenuptial Planner Pillows

"Pre-nups are healthy for a relationship. It's good for our lawyers to get to know one another."

'It is better to have lost at love with a good prenuptial agreement.'

Dog on a sidewalk. 'My name is Sophie. I've got papers and loads od obedience ribbons. But my people got a divorce and I ended up in a shelter. Lucky for me my new family signed a pre-nup.'

'Well, okay. But instead of prenuptial agreement, I want a quick get out clause.'

'Please tell me you're baby sitting?'

Lesbian civil partnership.

"In lieu of a pre-nup we decided just to label everything."

"Stepping on the gown never works. They run faster without it."

"You may now kiss the bride..."

'Now I kinda wish we had planned a bigger wedding.'

"We stumbled onto a house - and both of us being young and in love and quick to grasp the situation - "

"Honey, you're spoiling that child."

'Do you promise to love, honor and remain co-dependent until death do you part?'

Man dreams of romance whilst a woman dreams of romance and babies.

"Thanks to my wedding planner, everyone in the wedding is still talking to each other."

"And do you, Deborah Tannen, think they know what they're talking about?"

Naturally, Bob thought the midwife was for him.

"And now, Marla and Dave will text their own vows."

'Okay.. what the hell.'

" ... and peace be with you, although not likely."

"The wedding cake as holy sacrament"

"No, the cordless embryo isn't available."

"Look! I'm going to be a customer!"

"As this is a civil ceremony, I'd rather you took the vows without swearing."

Boat wedding.

"...until death do you a favor."

"Mating dance? Good luck with that. I couldn't even get my husband to do the chicken dance at our wedding."

'He does.'

Don't worry, I see babies, lots of babies...

'I always cry at weddings!'

'I now pronounce you man and wife, you now may kiss you sweet little bachelor butt goodbye.'

'Never mind singing it in rap... a simple 'I do' will suffice.'

"Will you listen to the same three anecdotes until one of you dies?"

'Apparently the stag party has gone into extra time.'

"Maybe we should have just had a baby..."