Practical Joke Lovers Gifts

Jesus the comedian.

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"I've done this procedure so often I could do it in my sleep. But that's only happened twice – that I'll admit to."

Smart Ass - Wise Ass

'Sorry sir, we've run out of parmesan cheese.'

'Your shoe's untied.'

'Not that sort of body building program!'

"If I can't ask for more wishes, how about more genies?"

"It says: 'The teamwork that got you here is the real treasure.' Aww."

"That's all I get? A sonogram? No tracking number?"

'Sometimes, laughter is the best medicine.'

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

'Marsha, did you file the Peterson account on the cumulus, stratus, cirrus, or nimbus cloud?'

'and remember delivery is free if it happens in a half hour!'

Vegetarian Birds

"I saved us a hundred bucks on a Jolly Jumper."

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

"Because when you go first nobody else has any fun, that's why."

'I wonder why scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats.'

'Did you watch the horror movie?'

Your lobster was off!

Candid Camera store.

Doggone

'My medical school believed laughter is the best medicine.

'I love cutting trees in perfect circles because it drives aerial photography interpreters crazy.'

"He's the best our AI recruitment algorithm could fund, unfortunately our AI is really stupid."

'I'm into New Age. My new age is 26.'

'What do you like about winter? I like these crisp, cold morning walks in the glistening snow.' 'I like how you can keep your extra beer outside.'

What do you suggest we do about this?

"I'm gonna be a 'New Yorker' cartoonist. You're not supposed to understand it."

'Hah! The joke's on you — I already thought up a second opinion!'

"Oh no! Oh no! Oh no! Oh no!"