Power Point Perfectionist T-Shirts

'I shall not raise my voice, but be aware every word I say is upper case, bold, italics and underlined.'

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"I was hoping this presentation would be more interesting upside down."

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

A presenter with a very complex chart to explain a business plan - 'And it's as simple as that!'

How to deliver a successful presentation.

"Who wants to hear a funny story about the third quarter?"

"Any questions?"

Bullseye!

"Quit stalling, Smithers. Where's the SALES chart?"

'It appears the 'What?'s have it.'

"Peterson proposes we move out of the mountains."

'Thanks to the huge bonus, I find myself forced to admire you.'

'Ted, I really wish you'd update your presentation software so we could do away with the 3-D glasses.'

The Importance of Planning Thoroughly in Advance

"Good invisible exports figures this quarter, sir."

"I'll be glad when they invent PowerPoint."

Hanging off every word...

'This prediction has a margin of error of plus or minus fifteen...fifteen class-action suits brought against the company.'

"You need to take the weak parts of your presentation and work them into something that won't get you fired."

'Can't he ever use a different kind of chart?'

'At this juncture in my presentation, I'd like to dispense with the illusion of coherence.'

'This software package can cut your workload in half. Do you want to purchase two copies?'

"Remember that optimistic, slightly crazy, throw a dart at the wall forecast? We beat it."

Downward arrow on progress chart goes through the floor: 'OK, I know this doesn't look good ...'

"In response to your request for better communications, I'm going to increase my lengthy explanation by 50%."

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

'Is there such a thing as over communicating?'

"I can't tell you how it ended. That would ruin the sequel."

'Miss Pringle, I run a tight ship! What is this piece of paper doing on my desk?'

Presentation Skills: 1. Be Prepared.

'In,' 'Out' and 'Organize.'

"May I recommend our Seared Filet with Lobster Cream Sauce? It's very photogenic."

"We feel you're over analyzing things a bit too much."