Poultry Counselor T-Shirts

"Sometimes ... I just want to run away."

'Don't fall for all that...you should see him first thing in the morning.'

"I have special needs-- good food, warm bed, fresh water, and plenty of room to pop wheelies!"

Woman keeping a chicken in her room for fresh eggs

"I see so much love reflected back in his adorable little face."

SPCA: USED CATS AND DOGS

"Shouldn't there be some sort of pecking order around here?"

'Tasty bird.'

'Hello, Ebeneezer! It's me - the ghost of coming dinner!'

On Sale Today Free Range Chickens...Back In One Hour.

'With proper flossing there's no reason for hens to not have teeth.'

"Sherlock Combs there said he believes it's an inside job."

Hen Night

'You think irritable fowl syndrome is bad? Just wait until you hit menopause.'

The poultry mania - Cochin China Fowls

"If you're looking to adopt a dog that's good with cats, may I suggest Ruffus."

"Nothing to worry about. A nuggetectomy is a very simple procedure."

Maternity ward on the farm.

"The thing is we lived in L.A.,...we never even needed mittens!"

Re-home Sweet Home

"It's about time! You guys have been MURDER on my hemorrhoids."

Dog Training For The Ninties

'I have to face it Irma, I haven't laid an egg in a week now: I'm menopausal...'

'Small, medium or large?'

Non Compos Mantis

"I believe in eggs, and I think that you all believe in eggs, too!"

"I don't know what it is, we just look fabulous in Cranberry."

"We can't break the laws of nature, the workers can only lay a maximum of one egg a day: To increase production, you need to recruit..."

"Just between us, I came first, but I shredded the evidence."

"The flu is coming! The flu is coming!"

"So how do we know if they've got this helium virus?"

Kid about hen: 'She's the chief executive egg layer. I call her coop The Oval Office.'