Potion Admirers Pillows

'It's been murder since it was announced that eyes of newt might be a cancer cure.'

"Round and round the cauldron we go, in the exfoliating toner I throw."

"I hope that's low calorie eye of newt."

Newt sale

"Just a pinch, Helga ... spicy eye of newt doesn't agree with me."

'Alright, throw in your resume and the 'Get A Job' potion will be complete.'

'I had a cough at the time!'

"Where did you say you went to culinary school?"

"Abra-Viagra."

'Side effects include, headache, dry mouth, muscle fatigue and turning into a frog.'

'What's your poison?'

'I can't wait for a generic version of eyes of newts to come out.'

'What do you mean the FDA is going to start regulating the use of eyes of Newts?'

Ugggghhh....eye of newt's off!

"I conjured you up a dress, shoes, a corsage, and a limo—I'm not ponying up for an afterparty too."

"It's the witching hour somewhere."

'The arrows were more practical,,,,but I found these have a higher success rate,'

"Do you like eye of newt in your Mac 'n' Cheese?"

'I had a little cosmetic surgery done this week.'

'Not MORE flippin' crockery!'

"Eye of newt. . . wing of bat. . . hair of dog!"

'So what if she only brew a few cases a year. We can still do business.'

Drink Me.

Dear Medication, how are you? I'm feeling much better thanks to you?/ Finally she began responding to treatment.

"Since I've been using this organic stuff my potions are far more effective."

'Nine out of ten witch doctors stranded on an island prefer eyes of newt over bat wings for a headache.'

"I swear, you won't be able to tell the difference, plus, turkey eye of newt is much healthier for you."

'You will meet a tall, dark and handsome man. He will play forward on the pro-basketball team you've just bought!'

Rum Mage Sale Today

You're a strong, virile stallion of a man, Randy. Has anyone ever told you that? Many times. How would you like to be the "after" image in my new ad touting the health benefits of our new nonfat kale macchiato. Let me guess: You'd also like an old picture of me where I was weak and puny, so you can claim that's the "before" picture. Don't worry, I've got that part covered. Something about you looked different today, Rudy. Would you like fries with that observation?

'The good news is Prof. Trockenficker has found the secret of eternal youth. The bad news is it will make everybody look exactly like him.'

Wow. That WAS a lot faster.

Magic Potion Micro-Brewers

"What's this Artificial newt's tail? Instant toad urine? No wonder your spells suck!"

"Oh, knock it off! It's only cream of asparagus."