Post-vacation Tales Gifts

"We took a yachting holiday last year, strayed into the Bermuda Triangle, miraculously made it home somehow, but Brian's hair disappeared."

"It was a holiday I'll never forget...I saw life in the raw!"

'How was your holiday?' - 'Fantastic! Great weather! Great food! No illness!' - 'So, back to work tomorrow, then?' - 'Yeah, I guess so.' - 'Lousy, germ free holiday.'

"And so another trip comes to an end...with family brought closer together by a shared experience."

Well, you and I know it's our home, but our 'smart home' doesn't know it's our home

Excess Baggage: Sooner or later all those vacation bills come due.

'Welcome back, Mary. How were the vacations?'

'Think we should be packing up soon, Hon?'

"Home is where the WiFi is."

"The holiday was a real eye opener...the crowds,the unbearable heat and noise,the chaos...and that was just at Heathrow."

"Here we use the email term 'out of the office', not 'away lazing on a Spanish beach, without a care in the world.'"

"Did you pack your own bags?"

Woman is surrounding by penguins and can't reach her camera

John was bck from extended leave, but he hadn't quite got in the swing of things yet.

Mommy and I are back from New Zealand. How was your trip? It was great. I got to see where the Hobbits lived. And there was green everywhere. Then we had to go. They wouldn't grant you and your mom refugee status? No. We tried Antarctica after that. We tried real hard to fit in. But the penguins just would not accept us as part of their society. Tell your mommy Trump's only going to be president for eight short years.

Rip van Winkle goes back to the office/

"I've managed to arrange cover while you're on holiday. Janet has cancelled her honeymoon and John will probably be able to have his operation next year. You just go off and enjoy yourself."

Excess Baggage: For many of us 'Roughing it' means staying at a hotel without room service.

'It's good to be back, Ms. Norton.. did anything important happen while I was away?'

"Hi, I'm the new you."

'Life size enlargements done here.' - 'Do my pictures of the pyramids please.'

"Did you forget to tell anyone to water the garden while we were away?"

Excess Baggage: Perhaps you should have washed those clothes before returning home from your overseas vacation.

"You simply must tell me about that African Vacation you took!"

Lost Baggage - 'Do any of these look like yours?'

Lost luggage turning up on Mars.

'I just needed to get away for a while and recharge my batteries.'

'but apart from that, I had a fantastic time - and the Eiffel Tower was amazing!'

"It's his first day back at work."

'I see you decided against hiring a replacement while I was on vacation.'

Very funny, but I believe the term is 'jet lag,' not 'jet hag.'

"So... how was Disneyland?"

"I told you not to ask every b****r we met on the cruise to visit us when we got home!"

"Moira, did you invite anybody to stay when we were on Safai?"

"But Reinhardt, you have another week and a half left of your vacation.""I had to come back, chief. They laughed at my black socks on Nantucket."