Portrait-perceiver Pillows

Man to date about many self-portraits on his wall: 'Self-realization is where I'm headed.'

Cariactures

'The way the eyes follow you is uncanny.'

'The portrait is a mark of his extreme egotism, but, if you curtsy and bow sufficiently...say, 'Oh Yes Sir!'!, to everything he says, you should do OK'

"You're my Mona Lisa."

Framed Lady

Diego Velasquez

"Stop complaining and smile! It's a job, isn't it? NO wonder they call you Mona!"

'Are you done yet?'

Couple painting each other - one turns to the other and says, 'Hon, let's hire a model.'

'Could you tone down the smile just a little?'

Elizabeth II

Rembrandt's Selfies

Michelangelo Buonarroti.

"And that's me as a shepherdess!"

Portrait artist drawing DNA patterns.

"It's not the timing of our relationship that's wrong. It's the lighting."

'If I don't like it, I rearrange your face.'

'Well, you're not Michaelangelo!'

'Excuse me, would you mind...?'

Mitch McConnell

"But is it..?"

'Curses! My eyes were closed.'

AUGUSTUS JOHN

"I'd like a portrait of me in the style of him."

"I've been posing for half an hour. Shouldn't you be painting by now?"

"Your mother was young and restless and knew what she wanted. She wanted out."

Portrait Gallery

Leonardo Da Vinci tries to make the Mona Lisa smile.

'It's the least I can do. I don't have enough money to get cloned.'

'You're messing with my head.'

'She leaves before I finish her portrait.'