Portion Size Humorists T-Shirts

"Here's how our eating challenge works. The meal is free if you finish it without running across the street for a burger afterwards."

'Oh, nothing's wrong -- I just expected Earthlings to be taller, that's all.'

All-Day Breakfast

Paul Bunyan gets the leg-lengthening Operation

Jungle Games

'Yes, I did tell you to hang the fire extinguisher where it would be easy to reach, but...'

Circus Stilt-Walker with Girlfriend.

"That's still too high"

Giraffe Haircut

"I not only respect women, I look up to them."

Circus trousers

"I feel like I can't trust myself around food."

'The bad news is he wants to be a jockey.'

'I don't set the rules, but you do need to accept that you're a pony and move on Brian!'

'He was taller online!'

"Could I possibly get a bigger room?" (man bent over backwards).

Hopkins has been in charge of giraffes for 25 years.

Tall major and small page boy

'Seems like Joe now has three feet. His mother says he's grown another foot.'

Short man standing on stilts to take a picture with a camera on a tripod.

Astronauts - Shorty

"It's not just compared to the table, damn it. This is a small portion."

'Midgely, we've decided to put Gillen on this project.'

'The food is disgusting.' 'And such small portions.'

Climbing into the bathtub

It's OK guys! I've found the ford!

'This food is revolting. And such small portions.'

A short man with a tall wife is said to have married beneath him.

Why Giraffes Are Rarely Feature In Comic Strips

Interviewing tall basketball team.

'Don't make excuses, Moore! If you can't guard that guy, I'll put someone in who can!'

Visual gag (a small microsurgeon's office).

Short man to tall man: 'It's such a cliche to call short people aggressive, and if you do it again I'll punch your lights out.'

'I wish I was your height. My mom keeps the cookies on the top shelf where I can't reach them.'

"Actually, I got my nickname because I live in a loft."