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Reality TV within reality TV

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"I think Fifi has starred in enough videos for a while."

Amy Winehouse

'I don't think we missed much while we were hibernating: The newspapers' front pages are still devoted to sport and reality TV...'

Blake Shelton

Maps to celebrities courtside seats

Dr Phil meets his match...

"The most dangerous threats to civilisation are terrorism, TTIP and Kim Kardashian."

Snoop Dogg

"...You'll never believe who shared a prison cell with my dad!"

"Big, grabby hands are all the better to grab and...um...shake the hands of my many fans!"

"Another oil spill! More poor creatures that need crude oil carefully washed off their bodies!"

"Of course I'm dressed like a cheap w***e! It's Halloween! Duhh!"

"Could've been worse- they might have called him Dominic."

"There's a woman on tinder called Melania Trump."

Bangtan boys BTS caricature

"I wish to return this TV. All the programmes are crap!!"

"So have you been watching Bridgerton?"

U.S. Male -- 4 of 5

"If only a twenty-something megacelebrity slash style icon slash trailblazing entrepreneur slash regular-person-just-like-us would weigh in about our country's current ideological crisis..."

"My enthusiastic devotion to women has been disastrously misunderstood!"

Millie Bobby Brown

"And now it's time for synchronized cliff diving with the stars!" I think this reality show trend has just about run its course.

I can't hear myself think. What? The station changed our format. It's now talk show and house music. What? Trying to draw in a younger audience! Multiple media streams. What, Sadie? Can't hear! Boring. Need more.

We had a presidential preference poll in school today -- Spongebob Squarepants won.

'What sport are you pretending interest in this time?'

Atomic Bear: Part 26

Marilyn Manqué

"He's a TV doctor now. Here's a discount ticket to his next show."

'Thank you, Beyonce, for the inspiration! Pre-recorded lip-syncing! No more gaffes...'

Aqua Cool

Patient looks at doctor's head: 'Hang on, if you're a real doctor how come that thing says 'Arctic Monkeys' on it?'

For lunch, Maude bought the duck wrap.

Sinead O'Connor