Pools Pillows

'This pool's no fun - all they let you do is swim.'

'I think we're way beyond the point where algaecide is going to help!'

Caution Pool Drained.

'I'm just not feeling sufficiently incentivised today.'

"The peasants have lost all respect for the moat."

Keeping up with the jones

"Down the end and second on your left."

'Not very big is it?' - 'No, but it's 85 feet deep.'

'How's the water, dear?'

'Hey, you in the cap-I see what you're doing! Out of the pool!'

'I think he's doing ok, the coach says he has the attention span of a goldfish.'

"She's lost a contact lens again!"

Ah heck, don't complain now! This is just the 'Warm-up'!

"Oh no! Chlorine drinkers."

'Yo! No cannonballs!'

'I was close to winning the pools this Saturday. The bloke next door won.'

'That lifeguard's a real no-it-all!'

The old geezer was feeling a bit de-flated!

'I'm going to be sick.'

'If we send troops to Iraq...who will help Hockey defend us in the class wars?'

"I see Mom won't let you go to the lake again."

8 Feet. 5 Tentacles.

Cartoon showing a man swimming, when another swimmer has dived, bounced off his stomach and smashed through the ceiling.

The plaster of danger.

"You don't need a mask, I filled it with hand sanitizer." (man swimming in a pool, inviting in another person who is wearing a mask)

It was a bad day for Mr Effervescent

Swimming Prankster

"I begged him to learn how to swim—but did he listen?"

Dolphin tricks.

"I just can't seem to get into the spirit of the thing."

"Get Back in!"

"Oh, quit looking so uncomfortable! It's a pool party! You can't wear a cape and formal wear to a pool party."

"I got demoted."

"I lost my mojo in the deep end."

"Hey, you doing the backstroke, you've forgotten some thing!"