Pool Attendant Pillows

"Hey, you doing the backstroke, you've forgotten some thing!"

Seniors Snooker Tournament.

A small snooker player chalking his cue.

"Hey, I'm thirsty. I need a drink. A drink and a liverwurst sandwich. Hey, how about a sandwich and a beer down at Gallagher's, then we can go shoot some pool? Or maybe take in a movie. Hey, I'm talking to you."

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

"I know I'm a little early, but sometimes I need a break from that dreadfully cold weather."

Airline Debts: Layoffs to help us stay afloat.

'Buying the inflight entertainment system was a great idea of yours, Dear...'

The end of summer is near and you still haven't made plans

"Would you like some wings?"

Angels await for their baggage around carousels.

Fight or Flight

"I always check 2 bags, but one's just a sacrifice to the luggage gods."

'I've tried all night without potting a ball.' - 'Try taking away the wooden frame.'

Child on an airplane wearing a shirt with a switch that says "Airplane mode"

The World's Easiest Airport

'We will be 3 minutes late taking off. . . the pilot has to piddle.'

The World Wide Web.

'Stop pulling that silly face, Dear.'

"This bag is carry-on, and this one is kick-drop-throw-and-pile-on."

Newlyweds. . . 10 Years Married. . . 25 Years Married. . . 50+ Years Married.

Flight attendant piloting Santa's sleigh.

'You sent your wife to get a bottle of wine from the wine cellar? Your jet doesn't have a wine cellar.'

'Sure, it's our pool. . . but who's going to tell him that?'

"At least this year she got rid of the seat belts."

Employee of the Month Parking

'The attendant is very good. I tip him the occasional sparrow.'

"I'm afraid there'll be an excess baggage charge on your Filofax."

'Crushing empty beer cans is for wimps.'

A private jet takes off

'At this time, we would like to call those passengers who feel compelled to board before their row numbers are announced.'

"Sorry for the wait. Have you guys been here long?"

'Flight simulator'

'I like you, you've got balls.'

Vaccination Passport