Poll Pondering Prodigy Gifts

'I think your son shows aptitude for become a pollster...'

"I don’t know what your invention’s called, but it’s really irritating."

'They were hoping to gradually introduce him to the pro game, but injuries left them no choice.'

"When I grow up, I want to become president and eventually the subject of a groundbreaking, critically-acclaimed Broadway musical."

"This just in: According to a recent poll, painkillers have replaced religion as the opiate of the masses."

Mother puts extra long dummy in babies mouth.

"... And his piano teacher says that he definitely has Van Gough's ear for music."

"Being the smartest girl in third grade is going to Melinda's head."

"When I grow up, I want to be a scientists like Uncle Grog."

"Should we keep the receipt in case of returns."

'According to the latest poll, 64% of the public don't pay any attention to polls...'

Engineer on the move.

'The other kids at school say I might need glasses, Dad.'

"I'm sorry-his I.Q. is actually on the charts."

"Do you have any hopeless little drongos?"

'Beryl, I've been thinking.....'

"He's at grade level for everything except cursing. He's swearing at a 9th grade level."

'Are you the proud parents of our (drumming contest) winner?'

'Dad a dachshund is really half a dog high and two dog long...'

'Yep, I've voted in every election since 1948!' 'Don't be so hard on yourself!'

"How many times have I told you? Stop playing on the stairs!"

"With the Suzuki method, they start them campaigning as early as three or four."

'The doctor is ready to see you, Teddy...Bring your handler!'

"Why, it's Daphne—home from Foxcroft."

"He can't come out to play right now...he's working on his autobiography."

"I know at least two people who will sleep easier with him behind bars."

'Our poll shows the typical voter is all polled out.'

Dropping Popularity of Obama.

"The latest poll numbers must be out."

Combing Baseball and Violin Practice.

'I went through the data and found an 11.7% increase in the discretionary spending portion of our family budget, so I see no reason not to raise my allowance.'

"Your poll results on't look good. You're trailing 'statistically insignificant'."

"The latest numbers are in. More voters want you to drop out than to run."

"It's either "Bring your kid to work" day or it's "Drop of handbag in kindergarten" day today?"

'He was offered a role in a sitcom and has the potential to be a successful child actor. We've already set up a legal defense fund.'