Politically Incorrect Devotee Pillows

"We will rename some of our products because the previous names may offend certain ethnic groups. Don't worry, Gurkenman. I will continue to call you 'Dumbass'."

"Someone throw him a punchline!"

'You don't have to be a boring bastard to work here but it helps.'

"Cartoonist are harmless? Not at all!! These people have weapons!! Here, see for yourself!"

F1 - Quit Smoking.

"It's a baby. Federal regulations prohibit our mentioning its race, age, or gender."

This is where Brent council sends you

He wouldn't be calling the kettle that again.

"Why 'Black Death'? Why not 'rodent-related'?"

'I'm sorry Sir, no menus...there is concern that choice might be mistaken for discrimination.'

"We may go vegan in the cafeteria."

'I'm afraid I'll have to sentence you to five years, but you have been a beautiful defendant.'

"From now on it will be God, the Holy Non binary, God the Holy Cisgender and God the..."

John Knox

'Al Gore says he'll be back on the campaign trail as soon as he re-thinks his concept.'

"The president has banned the Mexican wave and replaced it with the American wave... Also, empanadas will now only use American jumping-beans."

"Great stuff, but here's an idea: what if it's an old white man?"

"I don't like the term 'Stone Age'. I prefer 'Prequel'."

The Perfect Holiday Card

"A film contract about your life and a percentage of the box office takings. How does that grab you?"

Calvin Coolidge

Dapper clown.

'I don't care what is politically correct... hench person just doesn't sound right.'

"You've got to help me! - I'm a white male heterosexual!"

"Hold it! My writers! Why aren't my writers up here with me?"

Texas - Home of Organic Free-Range Gas!

"Some of your viewers thought your recent 'You'll be sweating like a w***e in church' forecast was a tad offensive."

Biden or Bust

"Anyone can hate, Mr. Brookings, but can your gare fill a book?"

"We don't like the way you refer to them as 'hymns'."

'I don't know what you're complaining about. I should charge you for breathing my second hand smoke. This happens to be a very expensive Cuban cigar!'

"Thank you, sir. And have a happy holiday of your choice!"

Clancy: Life Insurance

Something for Everyone!