Political Punditry Fan Gifts

Sen. Krupt. I don't tell constituents that we're fueling inflation. I say we're protecting consumers and thanks to us they won't have to worry about buying any cheap stuff.

Ask Sadie. Dear Sadie, why are partisan radio zealots so ticked off all the time? Is it because no one will pay any attention to them? Yours truly, Dave Moore. Ottawa, Canada. May I digress into seriousness? Digress. Respectfully, you've missed the logic, sir. The more ticked off we get, the more you listen to us because you crave an outlet for your feelings of helplessness and crave being told what to do. You stupid @#$% jerk! Get a life! Digression suspended.

"There was apresidential candidate who stole my shtick. I turned him into 'Dopey Donald'."

TV SALES, 'Will the violence chip block out James Carville?'

'Heinz-Kerry tells a reporter to 'shove it.''

How are my Lies, Distortions, Mud-Slinging? 1-800 Politics.

News remote

"Like many in your field, you will end up in Congress."

"Geez. . . since when has ignorance become a virtue?"

You Are Here - Uncle Sam's Exit Strategy

"It's good to know she was butchered for a noble cause."

"What do you mean blood sucking pest? You're the one who invited me into your life!"

'Henry was an undecided voter four years ago when he entered that voting booth, and I'm still waiting for him to decide and come home.'

US recommendation for Middle East peacemaking.

In doctor's surgery: 'I'm terribly worried, doctor...he doesn't talk back to Bill O'Reilly anymore.'

Tony Blair in the morning and George Bush in the afternoon. Lulu and Stan were having a good day.

'Instead of the usual boring campaign speech, folks, I'm going to make some balloon animals!'

Trump's firings

With some regularity, loony old Uncle Mort rants about his political theories and blatherings. Today: His long-winded theory about the debt-ceiling negotiations. Feel free to nod off … It's the escalation of a religious war in this country. I'm listening, sort of. Those of us who believe in the role of government believe that mankind can improve our lot through innovation, investment, science. But those who oppose government essentially believe that our fate lies with God. Wake up, I'm pontifica

Rush Limbaugh, Balloon Boy.

Bureaucrats Resting On Hercules Soldier.

Greek Crisis

Biden Wins

Venom

Impeachment Chapter III

"I banned the movie 'Christopher Robin' because people called me 'Winnie the Pooh.'""Maybe I should ban the movie 'Liar Liar.'"

Servile journalism

The New Cold War

'This is not about regime change, honest.'

Faith Based

News Brief: The Saddam trial turned into a shouting match...'Is that like pundits squaring off on TV?'

I, for one, welcome our new Kenyan overlord!

'And this is Jim...he's responsible for marketing the hospitals.'

The Fiscal Cliff.

"For a change of pace, you shout and answer and I'll make up a question."