Political Pun Lovers Gifts

'I know you're tired of hearing the same old political cliches, but I believe in recycling.'

"Liberals!"

It's the season for political candidates to deliver their pitch to voters. Sometimes the pitch is like a fastball, direct and to the point. Or the pitch might be like a curve, starting off on one path and then going in a different direction. Voters might see a pitch like a changeup, something completely unexpected. Unfortunately, too often the candidate's pitch is like a knuckleball - it just seems to be erratic and nonsensical!

Finish Line.

Larry Downing Street cat. 'I'm still confused. Which are the Tories and which are the Lib Dems? At Battersea, dogs were dogs and cats were cats.'

"Don't worry, Emily. . . I'm woke and you're woke, so I'm sure our baby will turn out woke!"

"You can come home now, Roscoe, but don't worry...I'm sure you'll find plenty of election fraud come november."

Small country advertisng at the Olympics

"All other letters have been disallowed."

"Do you think Trump has read 'Contemporary Relativism and the Death of Meaning'?"

"I beg your pardon," said Alice, "but which of you is the Democrat?"

It's the same ingredients and aftertaste as stimulus 1..."

Thwarting the Boys from Brazil

'He's Barack Obama? I thought you said 'he brought a bomb on!''

"He, Igor? Who are we to play God with its gender pronouns?"

'The popularity polls love what you've done with the budget deficit....moving the decimal one point to the left.'

War of Words

Rattache

Cake News: Britain Desserts EU

"Bad news - the local sewage plant is made of reinforced autoclaved aerated concrete."

'According to his will, Tiddles left the bulk of his estate to himself. Because, he still has eight lives left.'

"We're not a school. We're a political action committee!"

"Your four-o'clock is here."

It's not a stampede … It's a flash mob!

'Yes, he plans to accept his party's nomination but first I have to accept his apology.'

Simplified Tax Plans

Fresh Blood In Politics

RIP: Here lies the last remains of civility and honesty in the political process.

'Very good, but not quite 'presidential vision'.'

Good Christians should be willing to die for President Trump."

'Pander to voters? Me?'

"I wonder if Congress has any openings."

"Oh, that's right next year is an election year..."

"We've got a new customer, Eddy: run a couple of kegs over to the Supreme Court."

"Remind me again, did the President say that or was it the Kardashians?"