Political Correctness Pillows

"I'm not a scaredy-cat - I'm phobic."

'For Pete's sake, we don't use the term 'bacteria' anymore! It's 'probiotic.''

'Don't call me mutt. I prefer the term 'hybrid.'

"My teacher says we can no longer call ourselves snowmen. Some snowmen may identify as snowwomen or vice versa. We must be precipitation neutral."

'So you're telling me that calling him black is a worse offence, if the offender is a pot?'

SEE SANTA, ''Happy Holidays'? -- Don't tell me YOU'RE getting politically correct, now?'

'Another thing?never use the term 'touchy-feely' as a negative.'

Today, Human Rights Watch sued a man named Santa Claus for discrimination against his employees by calling them 'dwarfs'.

"We're looking for a tough, aggressive guard dog. Have you been neutered? No, wait ??" I'm not allowed to ask that."

'Caution: Some content may be offensive to sensitive students.'

Inappropriate behavior

"The Equal Opportunity people say I can't call you my sidekick any more. You're now my personal assistant."

"This is Professor McPhee, sir -- he wants to start a 'plump studies' department."

"Grandpa! Wolf-whistling is not politically correct anymore!"

"Giving youngsters spoonfuls of sugar, Miss Poppins, is tantamount to child abuse."

"There's one thing that outrages me more than everything else that offends me..."

'Sometimes I miss the dress code requiring skirts for female employees.'

Crucified for off-air comments.

"I think I will go try my luck at the non race specific jacl tables before we hit the buffet."

"Get woke,woman! A lazy slob is what I identify as!"

"Excuse me, but I happen to identify as a left-handed person and this is a right-handed mug."

McCain Wins Republican Nomination

politically correct czar: 'Popular...Elitist'

"Where do you want to meet tonight, my safe space or your safe space?"

'We're quitting-me and my calendar!'

'I was expelled from school for a hate crime -- I told a little moron joke!'

''Happy Holidays'? -- Don't tell me YOU'RE getting politically correct, now?'

'Mutt is very insulting and definitely politically incorrect, but where do I find an animal rights attorney at this hour of the night?'

'I'm trying to be politically correct.'

Figgy warning.

'They used to make you stand in the corner for saying bad words - Now they suspend you for hate speech!'

He wouldn't be calling the kettle that again.

"Tom, although I think there is still some debate about whether 'client' or 'service user' is the appropriate term there's a consensus that 'that irritating bloody woman' certainly isn't!"

Politically Correct Snowperson

No offense, pal - I didn't know you were a tree hugger when I made that joke.