Politeness Practitioners Gifts

'I've never been any good at saying goodbye'.

Costermonger addresses gentleman

"Oh no, after you. I insist!"

'The sole reason I haven't talked to my wife for five years, is that I was too polite to interrupt her...'

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

'You're good with people. Just tell him to go fuck himself.'

"Discussion topic: Is our society becoming less civil and more violent?"

How to Do Small Talk??!!

'Dear Miss Etiquette, I'm never sure if I should say anything...'

"Not guilty, Your Honor, and thank you for asking."

The merger hits a snag.

Politeness opens doors

"Hello moon, the sun sends his regards."

'Say, please.'

'The Polite Lions' - a new sim game - "We've already got chairs, thank you."

'Try hitting him harder.' 'Is that all you have to say?' 'Try hitting him harder, PLEASE.'

A gentleman giving some children a lesson in manners

'I apologize for repeatedly asking if everything is okay, but displaying customer concern is part of our mission statement.'

Impasse in the corridor of the National Society of Common Courtesy.

'No... you first.'

Canadian Zoom

The controversy of ROW VS WAIT: 'Row, to find fish!'

'No. I insist. You first.'

"No offense."

'Sorry to interrupt - your monastery is on fire...the IRS wants to talk to you - and something about a missing case of wine.'

'It looks pretty flimsy, but I'm a gentleman: After you dear...'

'After you' said Miss Manners. 'Oh you first' insisted Mrs Etiquette.

"All you had to do was ASK us to leave!"

"You're very courteous for a hog"

"Passive-aggressive musical chairs." "You sit. I don’t deserve to" "I couldn’t possibly." "Maybe two of us could share." "Someone else go first." "I actually prefer standing."

"Can we not argue in public? Buzz me up and let's discuss this calmly."

A watched kettle never boils.

'Don't forget to say 'pretty please'.'

'Don't ask for anything.'

"It's not a self-improvement book. It's a how-to-tolerate-those-who-won't-improve-themselves book."