Politeness Champion T-Shirts

'I don't mean to be good but you look great.'

"Oh no, after you. I insist!"

'The sole reason I haven't talked to my wife for five years, is that I was too polite to interrupt her...'

"Nice talking to you too, even if you are a recorded message."

'You're good with people. Just tell him to go fuck himself.'

"Discussion topic: Is our society becoming less civil and more violent?"

Fishing.

'Dear Miss Etiquette, I'm never sure if I should say anything...'

How to Do Small Talk??!!

"Not guilty, Your Honor, and thank you for asking."

The merger hits a snag.

'Say, please.'

Politeness opens doors

"Hello moon, the sun sends his regards."

'According to the blood tests, x-rays and EKG... You're fat.'

'The Polite Lions' - a new sim game - "We've already got chairs, thank you."

'Try hitting him harder.' 'Is that all you have to say?' 'Try hitting him harder, PLEASE.'

A gentleman giving some children a lesson in manners

'I apologize for repeatedly asking if everything is okay, but displaying customer concern is part of our mission statement.'

"No offense."

Canadian Zoom

'No... you first.'

'No. I insist. You first.'

'It looks pretty flimsy, but I'm a gentleman: After you dear...'

'After you' said Miss Manners. 'Oh you first' insisted Mrs Etiquette.

"All you had to do was ASK us to leave!"

'Don't forget to say 'pretty please'.'

Back in the old days, when mob rule etiquette counted for something.

"Passive-aggressive musical chairs." "You sit. I don’t deserve to" "I couldn’t possibly." "Maybe two of us could share." "Someone else go first." "I actually prefer standing."

Small Talk Outlet

'Don't ask for anything.'

"Can we not argue in public? Buzz me up and let's discuss this calmly."

"Plea bargaining with my mom is more like please bargaining."

"You're very courteous for a hog"