Plot Twists T-Shirts

'This wasn't quite the fairytale ending that Colin had anticipated...'

It was my story. A murder mystery. A who-done-it-and-got-away-with-it-until-he-wrote-about-it.

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

Book Shop Plot Spoilers

"You have issues? Be more specific, what issues?"

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

'Turns out it was J K Rowling, in the drawing room, with a laptop.'

Subway Thrillers

Phone. Oh, no! My Clark Kent clothes are gone! Secret Identity Theft.

"The problem is there's no engine. Just a mysterious plot device."

"After several chapters of pushing a boulder up a hill over and over again, I think your average reader will watn to see something else happen, Mr. Sisyphus."

"We can't put you in a Witness-Protection Program unless you actually witnessed something."

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

"Now THAT'S what I call a surprise ending!!"

At Mary Higgins Clark's book club.

'Gosh, he looks so peaceful lying there, I almost hate to wake him up and put him in the oven.'

"Mr. Dankin, the plumber will see you now."

"Don't fall for it! He's just trying to fatten you up for Thanksgiving!"

"Better than Chekhov"

"I have a movie plot idea... A girl is kidnapped at birth. She's threatened, oppressed, and lives in constant fear. Here's the twist - the kidnapper is only in her mind."

"No, wait. What if the cop character is the murderer, and the mobster guy is completely innocent?"

"Perhaps this will refresh your memory."

Elevator choices: Up, Down, Different Narrative.

Crime

"It's structured as a set of two parallel stories that no one would ever want to read."

'I can't seem to find the 'surprise' ending.'

Cinema. I won't tell you what happens, but there's a great twist at the end.

"What can I get you?" "An explanation for that dumb reason why Batman and Superman stopped fighting at the end of Batman v Superman." "Would you like that spoiler-filled or spoiler-free?" "Spoiler-filled would be lovely, please." "Ok. Batman did not stop fighting Superman just because both of their moms were named 'Martha.'" "'Martha' was not just a person. In Batman’s nightmares, 'Martha' had come to represent all that was good about him." "When Superman whispered 'Martha,' it did t

I've decided to become a mystery writer. "Dark clouds filled the horizon as two young lovers walked along the shore. As if sensing something was about to happen, seabirds cautiously circled around the couple. Suddenly and without warning, the young man reached inside his jacket and pulled out a large bag of pretzels and began to feed the birds." I'm very proud of that opening. The story has just started and it's already filled with twists and terns.

"I agree, Glenn. The first sentence needs to hook the reader."

'Good news. The DNA proves you're not guilty, you have no genetic diseases, and you're a half-brother of the Prince of Glavistan.'

"It's the grisly story of the brutal murder of a publisher who rejected a brilliant novel about the brutal murder of a publisher who..."

"I've just had a meeting with your wife, lovely woman."

Ssshhh!!!!! - Lover and burgler trying to keep quite