Plot Twisters Mugs

No one will be seated after this comic strip has begun. Please do not reveal the shocking plot twist to your friends. This evening is not going to end well, Lance. Spoiler alert. (This cartoon was originally published on 2010-09-01).

'This wasn't quite the fairytale ending that Colin had anticipated...'

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

"I don't have the lip for saxaphone."

Book Shop Plot Spoilers

'And I love the part when he finds out that it was his brother all along!'

'Turns out it was J K Rowling, in the drawing room, with a laptop.'

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"Okay! Okay! It's a draw!"

Curtsey

The Cricketer and the Golfer

"The problem is there's no engine. Just a mysterious plot device."

Jack and the Beanstalk.

'This has a great ending...he shoots her.'

"We can't put you in a Witness-Protection Program unless you actually witnessed something."

"Well, I was under oath, so I couldn't lie outright, but I'm a weasel of course, so I have a way with words..."

"I have a movie plot idea... A girl is kidnapped at birth. She's threatened, oppressed, and lives in constant fear. Here's the twist - the kidnapper is only in her mind."

"Better than Chekhov"

"No, wait. What if the cop character is the murderer, and the mobster guy is completely innocent?"

"Architectural Digest calls it 'Twilight chic.'"

Manager. Managing a political campaign and a baseball team are alike in many ways. A campaign is launched with a "first pitch," when a candidate gives a speech selling himself or herself. I change pitchers based on the game situation. In politics and baseball, sometimes it's best to come from the right side and sometimes it's best to come from the left side. We study our competitors' weaknesses and exploit those. In politics we call that "opposition research." And I don't worry about the

"He'd torch the castle and I'd rescue the damsel."

Elevator choices: Up, Down, Different Narrative.

"Nothing wrong with half-truths...you still have 50% to manipulate."

"It's structured as a set of two parallel stories that no one would ever want to read."

"What can I get you?" "An explanation for that dumb reason why Batman and Superman stopped fighting at the end of Batman v Superman." "Would you like that spoiler-filled or spoiler-free?" "Spoiler-filled would be lovely, please." "Ok. Batman did not stop fighting Superman just because both of their moms were named 'Martha.'" "'Martha' was not just a person. In Batman’s nightmares, 'Martha' had come to represent all that was good about him." "When Superman whispered 'Martha,' it did t

'I can't seem to find the 'surprise' ending.'

Cinema. I won't tell you what happens, but there's a great twist at the end.

'We were playing Twister at a party. . . there was a loud popping noise.'

"I agree, Glenn. The first sentence needs to hook the reader."

"It's the grisly story of the brutal murder of a publisher who rejected a brilliant novel about the brutal murder of a publisher who..."

"I've just had a meeting with your wife, lovely woman."

'Best Seller'