Tale Twisters Mugs

Serf faints as apple is shot from his head by an arrow.

-Sorry about yesterday, I was ill! -You didn't look ill when I saw you at the races! -You didn't see me after the fifth leg!

"Still suffering from writer's block?"

"What your memoir really needs is an addiction."

"I don't have the lip for saxaphone."

"Great news, I've booked you two stag nights, a hen party and fourteen solemn thanksgiving services for members of the theatrical profession"

"I'm not spinning - I'm contextualizing."

"Okay! Okay! It's a draw!"

Curtsey

Hanukkah tree

"I told you we should have had separate trials."

Two cats making a heart shape with their tails

"No bouquet toss for this bride. She's shooting it out of a cannon."

'I still have time for both work and family - thanks to cloning.'

"We can't put you in a Witness-Protection Program unless you actually witnessed something."

"You may now kiss the... Oh, I see you have already done that!"

Jack and the Beanstalk.

"No, wait. What if the cop character is the murderer, and the mobster guy is completely innocent?"

'I started at the bottom, running mazes in the lab.'

"Architectural Digest calls it 'Twilight chic.'"

"I have a movie plot idea... A girl is kidnapped at birth. She's threatened, oppressed, and lives in constant fear. Here's the twist - the kidnapper is only in her mind."

"Well, I was under oath, so I couldn't lie outright, but I'm a weasel of course, so I have a way with words..."

"Rabbi Mandelbaum?"

"Nothing wrong with half-truths...you still have 50% to manipulate."

Elevator choices: Up, Down, Different Narrative.

"He'd torch the castle and I'd rescue the damsel."

"This weekend is seriously messing with some of my previously held beliefs."

"It's structured as a set of two parallel stories that no one would ever want to read."

'I can't seem to find the 'surprise' ending.'

'He's calling Running Bear on his mobile.'

Hybrid Cat Breeds

"I agree, Glenn. The first sentence needs to hook the reader."