Plot Keeper T-Shirts

'Oh no! I'm losing the plot.'

"Your hunch was right, Officer Garcia. We'll need a good editor to clean up this manuscript and bring his unfinished novel to a satisfying conclusion."

"I like movies that resemble my life, so I don't feel like I'm wasting time watching a movie."

"Max! Oh, my God! There's like a billion moving ideas in there!"

'I went into that meeting with a hidden agenda and then forgot where I put it.'

"It's about sex and revenge, except for a short chapter on the Continental Congress."

"I'm ready for summer vacation! A good book takes you where you've never been!"

"Tom's writing has been going really well! He's written over 200,000 words. Now he just needs to work out what order to put them in!"

"Where do you get your derivative ideas?"

"I thought they introduced the witch a little late."

Crossroads - fiction/non fiction.

“I’ve got an idea for a story: Gus and Ethel live on Long Island, on the North Shore. He works sixteen hours a day writing fiction. Ethel never goes out, never does anything except fix Gus sandwiches and in the end she becomes a nympho-lesbo-killer-whore. Here’s your sandwich”

"I don't mind car chases as long as they're car chases about something."

Park cleaner orders leaf to come down.

10 commandments

'I've worked out that all you need for a summer blockbuster is...'

'There's a bee here from the Food and Drug Administration who wants to inspect the hive.'

"Okay, I finished my novel. Now what?"

'Don't' Feed the Animals' sign with a saw in it.

"Sorry, but your personal life story just isn't very original."

"As your first novel, it starts out badly and just falls away!"

"Well, I've been struggling to write a book about my struggle to write a book..."

"We love your manuscript! It's exactly the sort of big, sprawling epic we've been looking for!"

"We need a plot twist."

Too much ambition results in promotion to a job you can't do.

'The only thing that made sense was the violence.'

Meet the author who hastily quit his day job.

He Didn't Know How To Appreciate Nature

Writer Will Work For One Good Plot Idea

"It's a novel about loss, and redemption, and fantastic sex."

Always Remember Their Sacrifice. . .

Ben Okri

"Don't write it!"

"No, I don't mind if you peek,' said the mystery writer to the next victim.