Playground Prankster Pillows

"O.K., now, when a teacher comes out, everybody look straight up."

'It's just as I thought... Cooties.'

'Don't be so dramatic and get into my office!'

Sent to the corner on school sports day.

"I think Wendy likes me... she kept the spitwad I threw at her!"

Norwich - 0 conker related deaths since March.

Bully playing conkers with a computer.

Everything was fine until Becky's little sister decided to skip double.

"It was a professional hit..."

'Red Rover, Red Rover...'

'She's been like that for hours. Maybe it wasn't such a good idea to dare her to drink her dad's coffee.'

'I have to hang up now. I'm getting some static on another line.'

'Yeah, girls smell good, but don't let THAT fool you!'

'Don't look at me...'

"This is the only time of the year when we get to hit the children."

"Don't worry, dear. You'll grow."

'Well, it's your fault for wearing my slippers.'

Gracie goes to get cookies for Santa, but Papi has eaten them all.

Boy rolled into a snowball

A cow poos down a hole.'UH-OH!'

'He barks when he sees the boss coming.'

Revenge of the Jelly Mother.

'Take two tootsie rolls and call me in the morning.'

"You see, it's perfectly safe to tease him..."

"If they want a snowball fight, then I'll give them one."

Resourceful toddler

Tree house.

Boy makes snowman around a lamp post.

Tamagotchi paralysis.

"This crucial pre-game drill keeps you focused and eliminates distractions!"

'Hi, this is Batman. You've reached the Batcave. I'm not in right now but as soon as I return I'll call you bat.'

"And this Halloween, try not to make a specter of yourself."

"Ok, I found a secure line."

Teddy Time Bears

'I did it all from memory.'