Playful Skeptics T-Shirts

'I need a statement that I've been here for the past 15 minutes and read David Hume's An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding.'

Science Museum. Why are you skeptical about the things scientists say? Because they claim the universe is expanding but when I visited my childhood hometown, everything was smaller.

'Item 56, we need to schedule a series of meetings to discuss whether we should have meeting to look at whether we're having too many meetings.'

Open House of Horrors

"I know it looks fine, but let's get an engineer's report and a termite inspection just to be on the safe side."

'You will meet a sexy, honest fortune teller who will take all your money!'

'What is the meaning of poorly attended staff meetings.'

Library. Story Hour. This fact-checking site says no cow has ever jumped over the moon.

'If Aunt Arctica is on the bottom of the world, does that mean Uncle Artica is on top of the world?'

"They say it's the first sign of aging - not being able to keep up with new technology."

"That reminds me of the time Hamlet and I – did I mention I knew Hamlet? – Hamlet and I..."

Microscope slide

Stupid medicine - Shake Well Before Using.

'Is this one of those deals where the names have been changed to protect the innocent?'

"MMPHH. . . I said I don't think I'm built for yoga!"

"What do you want to be when you give up?"

"Spaghetti made from squash? Sounds like fake news."

'I've had raging hormones for the last 80 years.'

"Podcasts, blech. It's like eavesdropping without the intrigue."

"You awake?"

Get rich today with cold fusion tomorrow! Invest now!: 'More like con - fusion! He's a con artist!'

"...nineteen, twenty. Ready or not, here I come!"

Agnostics Society: Absolute worst place to ask for directions.

'I can't believe you think that hypnotist was for real.'

'Pardon me, Miss - My therapist told me I should let my inner child out to play, so of course I'll be needing a sister...'

"Grown men! There's no such thing, Molly."

The world may be my oyster, but I've never been able to pry it open.

'You'll have to hang on a second, dear - I need to re-boot.'

"Mum said it's OK for us to watch. So it can't be much good."

'So God created the world in six days. Any sort of warranty on it?'

'Neither snow, nor rain, nor gloom of night, will ever stop the US Postal Service...from raising rates.'

'Dad says our house has a skeptic system.'

Yes, you will lose your hair. Magic Cue Ball.

'This study suggests that pessimists are a whole lot better at judging the true state of affairs than optimists...'

'Gold by post - send us your gold and we'll send you what we think it's worth.' 'There's mugs in them thar hills.'