Playful Praiser Pillows

'Your work is improving, Melvin. this report isn't half bad.'

Ice Cream Surgeon

'Take my tip,sonny and say it with jelly babies.'

'You may now kick the bride.'

'Say low-cholesterol dairy-free alternative to cheese!'

I like this one. Do you have it in blue?

'Remember last Saturday. . . you were bold that day. No dear, caught.'

"It's partly my fault he's been ignoring me lately. I'm the one who gave him the laser pointer."

'We've been playing house for 5 minutes, and she's already nagging me to get a job.'

"I'm not so sure I can handle this."

"He's dumbing down the sermons again."

"I'm very pleased with the way you've handled this thankless boring job, Fenwick...."

"When I'm with you, Ted, I feel dirty."

A boy who doesn't want to put down his drum while he prays

Two men in T-shirts, one shirt says Jesus loves me, the other Jesus loves me more.

Excommunicate Me.

"And the Lord he sayeth 'doest thou thinkest I knoweth not who sniggereth at the back there?'"

'My socks don't match, but neither me nor my socks care.'

I'm not just jumping on the bed. I'm perfecting bedspring-cusion calasthentics!

Grocer with pretensions of being a soldier

"I thought you might like to hear how my love-making sounded when I was a younger man."

Closet.

Beard, socks and sandals.

"How come there's a forbidden fruit but not a forbidden vegetable?"

'I knew I shouldn't have brought you along. I haven't had a hit all day.'

Kid sweeps dirt under his junk on the floor.

'It's for you.'

"Warm and rich, fresh and bright, with depth and intensity. Not the wine, you."

'Bottle nose! Bottle nose!'

"Congratulations. I just need your initials here."

"Oooh! I never knew your butt could move like that, honey!"

'My dad says I'm good at training little animals - Sit, boy!'

I wonder if they have these in an eighteen...

"This gown just ain't big enough for the both of us."