Playful Portfolio Manager T-Shirts

First Little Piggy Investment Associates

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

The day the stock market went UP.

"It creates the illusion of risk but you know you're perfectly safe."

Build Your Own Portfolio

Investments - remember, you are what you invest in!

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

Investments - Founders Bear and Bull.

"Until we get a bigger chart, we're estimating it's now about up to here."

'The bad news is it's all our client's money.'

Stock market Bull & Bear financial whirlwind.

Perks Featured in Vacancy at Toy Company

'well of course I'm giving your portfolio the attention it deserves, I'm even wearing a black armband!'

'Stocks were up on news that no performance enhancing drugs were used to achieve today's highs. . .'

"Ed and Helen's portfolio rose 3 point today on Dave's purchase of 100 shares..."

Hedge fund sharks attacking 'The Markets' ship.

'Based on your travels, what would you say is the greatest potential downside, if any, to investing in the Upper Amazon?'

'The Truth-in-advertising people want us to call ourselves the 'Sluggish Fund Group'.'

Fiscal Compass for the Global Investor.

"Sorry, stock-market jitters."

Pillaging, formerly Acquisitions Department

'Time to buy.'

Hedge Fund: Our 'Swaps' which mimic stocks, were voted #1 derivative of the year!

'Look on the bright side; you got out of that stock before it became...unstable.'

To determine which department would be awarded the Billings contract, employees agreed to play a best-of-five dodgeball tournament.

"Now that's how to declare a dividend!"

'I was just beginning to think about my portfolio. Now you're telling me to rethink it.'

Symbols of Wall St: bull, bear, Humpty Dumpty.

"Your stork analyst is here, sir."

Young Doctor, Young Nurse, Young Undertaker

Long and Short term investments.

The Invisible Hand of the Market

Standard And P****d.

'Wake up! You should be worrying about our investments!'

"Make it Dow 30,000, and I'll sell you my soul."