Plate Watchers T-Shirts

'What aren't we eating today, my love?'

"They must be grown-up ducks, because they're eating the crusts too."

Cariactures

"They haven't said two words to each other—it's sad... I hope we don't end up like that." "They keep talking to each other—it's exhausting... So glad we don't have to do that."

Glance Exchange

'Will you please stop feeding the pigeons?!'

Coffee shop

"I'm sick of watching the same movie every day."

"I said isn't it great to get away from it all."

"Ma'am, why don't you go ahead of me?" "Um... no thanks. Let's let this gentleman go ahead of us." "Oh, no... you ladies go right ahead!"

"Look, Martha—you contribute, I contribute, we all contribute to the pulse of the city."

Hedgehog holding sign saying 'the end is nigh' as man invents the wheel.

"Let me through – I'm morbidly curious!"

A sign outside a bookstore reads: "Meet the people in the bookstore cafe staring at their laptops 2-4 p.m."

"The security scanner said I have exquisite feet."

Worthless B*****ds

People on the train reading each other's books - only it's the same as their own.

"Do you want a drink or do you need a drink ? We're very busy...."

10 Days Without an Interest Rate Change

'Nobody's leaving till I get the offering plate back!'

Thru The Eyes Of A Lifeguard.

"Of course it's not easy to read the body language of someone who's basically inert."

'The popularity polls love what you've done with the budget deficit....moving the decimal one point to the left.'

Startling!

"We're talking business ethics not ethics."

"You don't need me. You don't need anyone. You are Americans."

The reserved and the go-ers.'

Bank. 18 month CD 1.0815255645% Paying More digits than any other bank. Interest rates are so low! It's hard to believe this CD has reached maturity --- Just look at how little it's grown! Investing seems extremely risky these days. There's no safe place to get a decent return. They always say investing is a roller coaster. Yeah, but it's not true. On a roller coaster you get back to where you started!

"What's wrong with you? This isn't what I want! Do you know what you're doing? Can you get me a smarter clerk?"

'As long as I stand here I'm safe. . . no stress. . . no pressure. . . no need to impress. . . I can just relax and be who I am. . .'

'The Human Comedy needs a laugh track.'

'I think this is where our fish pond was.'

"Nan and Gordon are from California, but Northern California."

'No idea. He's been there for as long as I can remember.'

"I gave on the E train."