Plastic Pundits Pillows

Bubblewrap Supplies: Just Popped Out

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

Skeptic Tank.

Genetic modification creating plastic from plant cellulose.

"Here's something called "The Fifty Greatest Countdown Shows Ever!""

"Spoiler alert! I'm about to tell you the part that really bugged me about 'Wolverine.'" "You don't have to say 'spoiler alert,' minion. It's been a month." "Anyone who hasn't seen it yet has not fulfilled their role as a dutiful consumer, and deserves whatever spoilage they will receive." "In fact, let me know who they are and I'll enter them into my database. When the corporatist revolution comes, there will be consequences." "Um... never mind."

"A Bill of Rights? - Don't you TRUST me?"

"All the good ones are either married, gay or Viggo Mortensen."

"Oh, goody. More reality-based crap."

National Living Wage from April 1st.

"We subscribe to five streaming services so why are we never able to see the hot new show everybody is raving about?"

'Don't worry! Since 28% of my salary goes to the government, I've decided to work 72% of the time!'

"Why settle for itsy-bitsy when you could be swole as hell?"

'What if we televise government budget hearings and make them pay-per-view?'

"An overload -- even this is beginning to look like Kitsch."

Hoodies anticipate bride's choice of wedding dress.

'The Final Merger'

We can safely tell the Grand Jury your campaign money isn't soft, it's al dente.

New Year 2020

"I'm not concerned about us as long as there is nothing in the stimulus package for cats."

World Health Organization

Cat holds sign that says 'come over here', dog holds a sign that says 'how?'

Today's sermon: 'Do sin taxes violate the seperation of church & state?'

"For the hundredth time—I have no idea how to make crystal meth."

Lessons from the fossil record: Discarded consumer goods in the anthropocene layer in the rock strata.

"What do you mean, we don't have an 'exit strategy'?!"

'The trouble is not with your set -- the station just got hit with a new batch of politically correct Federal regulations.'

"So the only way to save the economy is to spend what we haven't got - plus ca change - moin ca change!"

"That reminds me of the time Hamlet and I – did I mention I knew Hamlet? – Hamlet and I..."

The Ultimate Reality TV Show: Apathy Island