Plant Pun Aficionado T-Shirts

'Stopped a shoplifter today. Caught him red-handed.'

Argutifolius Fistulosis

'..and we thank thee for these bio-engineered vegetables..'

Owing to a clerical error, Luciano Pavarotti receives kudus instead of kudos for his performance as the Duke of Mantua.

"Hic. Gosh and begorrah!" "Wha?"

"He refuses to talk and he never listens."

"He treated associates like he treated his plants."

"What are you in for?"

Happy Bifurcation Day,

"I have to be honest: the job you're applying for is a real no-brainer. Are you sure you're OK with that?"

"Nobody loves me." "Yeah, nobody listens to me. Not even my wife." "My kids don't respect me."

"I'm looking for something a little more open pan."

Flytrap nerd.

"No conifering, please."

Tree's Tree Nursery. Of course we can plant them. We'll be right over! $. It's the only hedge fund I can get behind. Tree's Trees.

'I get a lot of job offers..'

'The vegetarians are the smug-looking ones...'

'Joe said he had some special bulbs.'

"Like most of your proposals Pinkley ...it ain't gonna fly!"

'Without Van Gogh, his ear painted even more abstract!'

Cover my mouth when I cough? with what?

'The SPCA called on Schrodinger...'

"So how often do you have these dreams about the axe?"

"Good news - he's in a vegetative state."

Say it with cacti

"Mr. Whopple, time to slow down on the veggie diet!"

Chick escapes from egg prison.

"Please tell me I look NOTHING like THAT guy!"

Cactus Hold Up

"I'm Eggspecting."

Barnyard Motel. You'll get your (cursing symbols) wake-up call when I say you'll get your (cursing symbols) wake-up call.

Rabbit spraying 'Hare Spray' on head.

Northern Ireland Garden Centre - Seeds of Democracy: Might not blossom.

"Bloody cowslips!"

"Wouldn't this one look nice shrivelled up in the kitchen?"