Plant Procrastinator Pillows

"I might let the window box lay fallow, this season."

"Ideas that jump from noggin when head not yet screwed on."

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"I'm waiting for my imagination to run riot."

Housewife: Out of Order.

"I can't mow the lawn today. A bug just flew up my nose."

"Things to do today: 1) stare out window 2) crap on new bedspread 3) stare out window 4) claw up ottoman 5) stare out window 6) take nap."

Nethead strip: Over doing the time spent on the computer

'I'm not lazy - just resting before I get tired...'

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

'So you've finally got round to mowing the garden.'

'Work's the greatest thing on earth... so I'm saving some up for tomorrow!'

Invaders from Planet Manava.

'Hey, boss, what's a 7 letter work starting with 'w' that represents what I should be doing rather than solving crossword puzzles?'

"Do you mean am I busy busy?"

Rip van Winkle goes back to the office/

"That painting's not going to paint itself."

"The pastor can't be disturbed. He's preparing for Sunday's service."

"Man! I just had to pull another all-dayer."

Messing around on the internet when your boss thinks you're hard at work.

"The AI art generator became self-aware, and now it just procrastinates and questions itself."

"Frankly, I could move a lot faster, but the truth is that I lack motivation..."

To do list

"I suppose one of us should call somebody."

"He should be there by now. He left for work an hour ago."

Why are you texting instead of working?

'I asked you to clean the fridge, not declutter it.'

'I'm sorry I didn't practice this week, Mrs. Tinklemeyer. I just had so many distractions!

'I want to speak with you about your work habits.' 'You mean work is habit forming?'

Smug Colleagues Leaving Work.

Champagne cork stopping sand in hourglass

The reason you will never catch up with your paperwork is that late at night, in a nest of shredded manila folders, your most important files have babies.