Plant-based Warriors Pillows

A vegetarian cursing a cow.

"States of tofu"

'We use to tiptoe through the tulips. . . now we just waddle through the weeds.'

"Mom, I'm at work – let me call you back after I finish stocking milk for wealthy vegans who like beet juice in their meat alternatives so they can still get that bloody effect when cooking without guilt."

Veggie Hall of Fame.

"We would like to be genetically modified to taste like Brussels sprouts."

"I don't care if it's plant-based, you're creeping everyone out."

"Getting drunk grilling lettuce just isn't the same."

"I eat a totally plant-based diet and I still can't lose weight."

'I'm writing a vegetarian cook book.'

'New Barbeque.'

"I just found a lacto-vegan restaurant and Janet from accounts says she's FRUITAIAN!"

"Our vegan dishes are the same as what cows eat: Nitrates, Pesticides, Ammonia, Antibiotics..."

'Say, aren't those the same weeds that came up last year?'

"Race you to the corner! Last one there is an expired egg substitute!"

"But Herman, we can't just throw in the towel like that."

'No - we really don't cater for vegans, even our salad dressing is made from sperm oil!'

"How did you cure your dog of begging for food?"

"I'm getting subtle hints of chlorophyll."

"It helps if you think of it as a turkey."

Dale regretted going to the Vegan restaurant.

"'Tofu'? Qu'est-ce que c'est 'tofu'?"

The early days of tofurkey.

"I am still vegan, I am just having a cheat day."

"Apparently, giving up wearing fur wasn't enough!"

"You said we were going to break bread, Mom. These are vegetables."

'The only vegan item on the menu is the menu itself.'

"I can't remember which ones are plant-based."

"It's a victory garden. And the weeds have won."

'... Got anything besides apples?'

"How almond milk is made"

Planet earth was again safe, Lenny a true hero and his brussel sprouts, for one, not wasted!!'

'Hey, a fly! This is supposed to be vegetarian soup.'

"After going vegan, replacing all the animal heads just made sense."