Planned Safari T-Shirts

Mo's Meet The Predators Safari Tours.

Feedback card for lions eating their prey.

"No wonder they've spotted us! Tail down Fred, tail down!"

The Z Chromosome: Zebratic engineering with questionable results.

Safari.

'Oh boy, meals on wheels.'

Safari tourists surrounded by lions following a 4x4 car crash.

Bob realised that he'd had his binoculars back to front.

"And that's why you go on safari."

'At least, Men point cameras at you these days: In my day, they pointed guns!'

'Don't move, there's a bee on your back.'

'Okay wait. Screaming and failing is for large cats...'

"Photo safaris are not what they used to be: They seem more interested in taking selfies than photos of us these days..."

Leopards do change their spots

Will Kill For Food

'This veldt makes me worry about the condition of our yard back home.'

'Where's all those lions we were told are out here?'

Final selfie

'Stay on all fours. That way you can pounce on new consumer wants.'

'I'd love to help you guys, but I've got it pretty good here. I protect them and they throw me their sick and occasionally the odd jerk they want rid of.'

"So, how long have you been a holiday relief?"

Tourists viewing fake giraffes on safari

'Can I get you a drink first?'

"I feel lousy...I think someone I ate disagree with me."

'Keep driving - we can't open the doors anyway!'

'In my nightmare, this little guy in a pith helmet keeps trying to book me on a safari.'

"King of the jungle, huh?"

"We're hoping you can join us for a little drink at the water hole at dusk."

"So what's this then? Old or sick?"

"Forget it, he's got a brain the size of a walnut: No point reasoning with him to let us cross..."

"Whatever you do, don't show fear."

Safari Park signs F1: DON'T FEED THE LIONS! F2: DON'T EAT THE HUMANS! two signs in a safari park catering for both Lions and Humans

'I say, we just avoid this general area.'