Planetary Protection Officer T-Shirts

"I'm hear to apply for the planetary protection officer opening. I brought my own outfit."

What are you giving Mother Earth this year?

'What motivated you to become a environmentalist?'

Rocket Launch Control Centre Back in 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

Deforestation.

North Pole

'Don't feel bad — all tree huggers get a splinter now and then.'

Nature versus commerce.

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

Natural Disasters

"Stop the throw-away mentality! Save resources! A New Year every 750 days is quite enough!"

"We finally reached net zero emissions."

'Humans & Lemmings have a lot in comon...'

Eco-Anxiety For All Seasons

"I'm sorry, but we're looking for someone who's more likely to be followed than following."

How can he sleep so comfortably knowing that pillow will someday be clogging a land fill...

It beached on a pile of plastic bottles, so they were able to just roll it back out.

Child protects planet with umbrella.

"Have you tried turning it off and on again?"

'To help save the environment, I've replaced all of our lightbulbs with compact fluorescents. Now I'm running the old ones over to the landfill...'

Global Warmer 2000.

How can I enjoy that clean, fresh, salt air when I'm up to my neck in garbage?

'We have a strict don't-ask-don't-tell policy for salaries.'

'And this one's framed in beautiful Brazilian hardwood.'

Climate Crisis

PERSONNEL, 'Why did you leave your previous employment?', 'They asked too many questions!'

No pollution! It's a good day to get my eco-nut sister's present. What is it? Something she's agitated for all year. Where are we going? Here's good. She's so lucky. Not everyone gets fresh air for Christmas!

God not-too-happy with the Humans sticking a 'Closing DOWN Sale!' sign on planet Earth

Bottle Bank: For the Colour Blind.

'Well, kids, it all started with a massive Federal program to combat global warming....'

"Oh, honey, look! Just under that candy bar wrapper, next to the empty Bud Light can and to the left of the plastic bag... a salamander!"

Just Stop Boil

"Good riddance! They were messing up the environment."

'The good news is we've discovered a vast new oil resource. The bad news is we need a space ship to get there.'

'I must be reaching that age! I can't get my ozone layer up anymore!'