Planetary Pioneer Gifts

Life Discovered on Mars

"Sadie, they found a planet orbiting Proxima Centauri. That makes way over 1,000 planets we've discovered in my lifetime." "It must be exciting for you, discovering there are 1,000 worlds full of people who can't possibly know what a doofus you are." "...Unless they've got telescopes." "It is exciting. Now I know how you must've felt when Oog the Caveman discovered Venus." "I see you're bringing what passes for your 'A-game' today."

Spaceman

Fifty years of deprivation for the colonists...

"We've really had it this time."

Rocket

Rocket Launch Control Centre Back in 10,9,8,7,6,5,4,3,2,1

"The Ice Age must've caught him by surprise..."

'Gravity...Go figure!'

"No, you're in the Milky Way galaxy."

'The good news is we've discovered a vast new oil resource. The bad news is we need a space ship to get there.'

'You're about to see a drive for the ages!'

Today, a special retro segment of The Fad Herald. It's the Fad Herald. Off the hook! Hey jive turkeys, here's what's not cool: Fossil fuels, dependence on Mideast oil, long gas lines. Here's what's groovy: Solar power, alternative fuels, energy independence. Can you dig? The world is changing, baby! Instead of solar panels, I'm buying a sweet 8-track player. Next week, a look ahead to 2040. What's out: Waiting in long lines to fill up the spacecraft with gas.

"Let's f**k up Mars!"

TV - MARS, weather: 'Very hot and dry days, bitterly cold nights and no precipitation for the next several million years!'

"Yahoo! We struck earthfriendly oil."

Cosmic Rays: Large cartilaginous interstellar space-dwelling fish of the order Myliobatiformes. Feed on planets containing plankton and small schooling fish.

"AS a matter of fact, yes, you have told me you vacationed on Earth."

'...it's some distance away - but there are lots of 'em and they're edible.'

"I don't know. He just said he had discovered something and we had to come over and see it."

'It's better than we expected. Now the sheep produce wool in the winter and cotton in the summer.'

'I can't help thinking there's something else we can do with this.'

"Isn't Mars over that way?"

"Listen, the first pterodactyl of spring."

'Another invention? -- You are SUCH a geek!'

Genetic Research and Engineering Department (sign has 6 fingers)

'And that's how we discovered curly genes, or, as Dr. Crick insists on calling them, 'DNA'.'

Only in the newspapers.

Man cold-calling on phone from igloo

"Houston - we are landing in the crater now. . . on first viewing, this planet looks uninhabited. . ."

Solo North pole expedition - 'Bugger!'

'Him?.. Oh, he's the guy who discovered fire.'

Map of Solar System from Memory.

Leap Year

"Wait? I thought it was a 'look'?"