Plague Humorist Pillows

"Dammit Harold, you know I hate that mask!"

Zombie standup

6 Quarantine-Friendly Fashions

Captain Ahab searched for a vaccine.

"Mom, please shake my chair. I'm taking a virtual school bus ride before class begins."

"Houston, we have a problem."

Distance to avoid contagion

What's that? - 'It's a mosquito bite.' - 'Scratch it!' - 'No, I need to buy some cream.' - 'Make it bleed!!!' - 'Gahhh!!!' -

Grim Reaper rowing a boat full of dead souls to the afterlife; a tip jar sits on the side of the boat.

Lend me your ears

The Official Covid-19 Diet

Comicron

Down a the lab - Germs "So what will you do when you grow up?" "Oh the usual...divide,multiply,infect,kill.."

"What do you mean blood sucking pest? You're the one who invited me into your life!"

"Any chance of upping the affection quota, given the current situation?"

The Organic

"I find wearing a mask helps."

Viral Pathology Center (janitor finding three dead bodies)

"Dear, you are Definitely coming back as a centipede."

"I've finally finished my lockdown novel."

Decontamination

Start of school year in Cuba 1

The trap

"We're gonna make, Rose! Keep washing your hands!"

"Yeah, don't worry about the smile; I'll just wing it."

I break for toilet paper

'His Trout Almondine Veal Cordon Blue in mushroom sauce was crudely seasoned.'

Martians looking at Earth - 'One day son, all this will be yours.'

"Well at least nobody notices we don't go out much anymore."

Baseball player wearing a face mask.

"So Mr Bond, we meet again."

"Not cool washing sheep in the dishwasher people!"

Covid-19, Mask Up

The Masked Singer

Do what you can to flatten the curve