Pirate T-Shirts

"So are we clear, Lads? No more saluting."

'So the good news is the operation was a total success. Bad news. . . we were out of hooks.'

'Ships plumber reporting for duty.'

'Maybe I should abandon my crew and keep all the treasure for myself!'

'I can't pretend I'm not a little disappointed.'

'Without thinking Captain Hook uses the wrong hand'

Pirate trying to choose what to wear

Ye Old Mariners Inn.

'This isn't the kind of sales job I was hoping for.'

"This is it! According to the map an X-ray marks the spot."

Pants on the mast

'If I have to perch here all day, then you really need to do something about your ear hair.'

'FIRE A... warning shot across her bow.'

"How much to insure my artifical leg?"

"Since he lost a leg he's become unstable!"

"You're absolutely sure my wife won't be able to find this?"

"I like how you succeed, despite your disabilities!"

"Well, he was a lousy captain, but he sure knows how to go out in style!"

'I didn't say you're getting old, Cap'n - I just asked if you need glasses!'

"I see you did a swashbuckling internship with Blackbeard. Impressive."

Sailors of the Early 1700's often mistook the manatee for a beautiful mermaid...

Captain's Log

'Come out - you drunken old rat!'

"You look good for your age."

"We made it more convenient so that you don't even have to walk now."

"Be careful, there's a parrot in there somewhere!"

'Take the advice of an old sea dog, Lad. Never provoke a fight with the phrase, 'You want a piece of me?''

Blackbeard needed help living up to his name.

'Forget it! — I'm not sailing all the way back to Europe just to get you a box of crackers!'

'Guess who?'

"Whaddya say, Black? We'll plunder the seas together. You scratch my back; I'll scratch yours."

Pirate with a Shepherd's Crook for an Arm

Catwalk The Plank

Pirate Dives For Underwater Treasure

"I haven't always been a cowboy, you know."