Pioneer Story Fans Gifts

'And I say it's a trick!'

"Meet the author"

"Recalculating route..."

"Only one pailful? Did they have water restrictions like we do?"

Mighty Man Of Justice Is Born

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

'I begin to question whether this startup ever had venture capital.'

Women of the Wilderness

"I love finding my food at the Farmers Market. Makes me feel like a true pioneer."

'Tarzan of the Kangaroos'

Red riding hood giving the wolf a complex

Pioneers of the ancient west

"Before someone says anything, yes, it was a long winter."

"I've done this show six hundred thirty-seven times. Tonight in Act Two I'm going to sing 'The Jet Song' from 'West Side Story'."

'It's a very hot item, right now.'

"You call that a KISS?"

Dniel Boone makes an involuntary fashion statement.

Davy Crocat

"I conjured you up a dress, shoes, a corsage, and a limo—I'm not ponying up for an afterparty too."

As luck would have it the hunchback's blind date turned out to be a hunchbelly!

'My startup could really use a pioneer type like you.'

"I say we just wheel it into the city. What's the worst that can happen?""

Wagon

L'il Buckaroo.

Early American Think Tank.

"There is a 5 month slow down. You are still on the fastest route. You will arrive next year."

'I told you we took a wrong trail at the Oregon/Idaho border, but NO, you wouldn't stop and ask for directions.'

The Little House on the Prairie - the Prequel.

'These new bendy wagons will be handy when pulling em into a circle.'

"He's really gone uphill, hasn't he?"

'Nice try, Chicken Little. We're not falling for that one again.'

'Early Toupees'.

Donner Party Pooper

"Remember my frog-slash-boyfriend? Well now he's my prince-slash-fiancé!"

No, we're NOT getting a convertible!