Ping Pong Perfectionist Gifts

'You're not supposed to jump over the net.'

Boy returns a shot in table tennis and breaks off a corner of the table.

Camping-Pong

We're going on a first date. So many words are misused every day. Literally! I don't accept the use of imperfect language. Me either. Trying to fight it has no effect. It's all a mute point. Irregardless, I could care less. I had nothing farther to say.

Golfer hanging from tree branch to play difficult shot.

Surreal ale

"Getting the ball in the hole on the first swing is good isn't it?"

Table tennis.

'Do you have any golf balls that are not attracted to water, sand or trees?'

"So is that a slice of a hook? I never know which is which."

'You beat me by two...but with your penalties I beat you by 150!'

"Just a drop."

'I read that the ball is on the surface of the club for just 0.00035 of a second, so even when you take 100 shots to go around, you are only getting less than 1 second of golf for your money...'

Quality Contorl.

Man in Office playing golf, filing cabinet draw marked 'Rough'

Ventriloquist's fete

"How'd it happen?

"You'll come? Great." "The Hendersons will be too." "We'll kill them at poker." "Phil and Edna, planning a murder for later that night."

Certificate for 98.4% accurasy.

Safety meeting.

I would love to learn Karate, but Dad insists I do Boxing instead: He says I have natural disposition for it...

Boxing Trainer: 'And watch out for this fella. He has a huge Left Hook.'

'Your backswing's too slow!'

"Don't rush me, I've got to get it right!"

"You hit the ball- that's ping. Your opponent hits the ball- that's pong!"

"Relax and enjoy the game! Relax and enjoy the game!..."

'He has a great left hook,'

Boy playing ping pong has paddleball

'Look at it this way...you're like a big pop star! The hits just keep on coming!'

Ping Pong

"Explain to me again why they pay him the big bucks."

Mount Everest.

"With my handicap I can park just about anywhere I want to!"

Ping Pong Handshake.

No caption (A ball boy crouches by the net on a ping pong table as a game is being played).