Pin Number Philosopher Pillows

'I didn't know I'd need a PIN number!'

'My imaginary playmate squealed on me!'

"Whoa, whoa, whoa. I thought we were just dating."

'... Of course it's expensive. It doesn't grow on trees you know!'

'Hello, Pastor Parker here. Thank you for calling moral support. Your call may be monitored to ... '

'My finger's stopped bleeding. I must have run out of blood.'

'Why are they called the opposite sex?'

'You have reached the Heisenberg Institute - Calls will be answered in random order.'

'Women, can't live with 'em, can't live without em.'

'Great putt. Lucky I hit the pin.'

"Sorry Peter, but you're just not evolving quickly enough."

"To quote my broker, 'Past results are no guarantee of future performance.'"

"And the Haves, you might say, are divided into the Gives and Give Nots."

'Fermat's First Theorem'

'What is worse: The fear of having a bad time. . . or the fear of having a good time?'

'Actually I'm looking for a less meaningful relationship. I didn't understand the last one!'

Colin knew things were going well when he saw his date trying to make him jealous

'So there's a fly in your beer — why begrudge a fellow creature a little happiness?'

"I'm not sure if this is getting through and I don't know what time you finish for the day...."

Hells singles

Bowling alley

"The government believes that the benefit system is out of hand!"

'I know 24 ways to kill a man - add another if I don't get a drink.'

People who ghosted me

"Alright, I'll admit it. I never have cleansed my palate of Charlene."

"What does your father do for a living?"

"Sometimes I unwind too fast, and it makes me a little dizzy."

Bacall Centre

Football Sisyphus

'I told you a five iron was too much club, man! You're lucky you hit the pin!'

'Just a bit more, mother - then you can go bowling.'

'I channeled John Dewey. He says if you want to be a good teacher, don't teach reading and writing. Teach students.'

"According to my Zip Code, I prefer non-spicy foods, enjoy tennis more than golf, subscribe to at least one news-oriented periodical, own between thirty and thirty-five ties, never buy lemon-scented products, and have a power tool in my basement, but none