Pigsty Promoter Gifts

"We've received complaints that you're feeding them nothing but slop three meals a day."

"We have to take that science away from Tommy...he's genetically modified the cat!"

Dogs Must Be On A Leash.

'How do I get people to visit my...'

"How do you expect him to grow up to be a pro if he doesn't start young?"

You thought YOU hated YOUR job?

Meet the Shameless Self-Promoter 2 PM

'Ere-we distinctly asked for SAM an' Ella!'

'Some of you may have heard that Dr. Weil is giving HIS talk right now in the next auditorium.'

'You're a filthy pig, Gordon! I guess that's why I love you so much.'

'He's a very superior dog. Even his fleas have pedigrees!'

Employment Dept. Fill Out Job Applications Here. This application form has too much space for "work experience" and not enough for "leisure activities."

Give Sleep a Chance

"Sure I'd love to buy thirty thousand subscriptions."

'Bon Bons Away!'

'Oh I retired a few months back...I'm a promoter now.'

'Usherettes and razzamatazz won't bring back the crowds - we need some new lions'.

"I can't decide which one of you should get the promotion, so I'm setting up a boxing match between you two to decide."

"I-800-DOGYLAW"

"So much for that publicity stunt."

"I can't decide which one of you should get the promotion, so I'm setting up a boxing match between you two to decide."

Three cheers for advertising.

Cats-can-sell anything advertising agency.

Oli was a walking advertisement for thickening & revitalizing shampoos & conditioners.

'He's got laryngitis. I'll have to speak for him.'

"Well done, another winner, Haskins."

''Woof, Woof, Woof.' You call that a blog entry?'

"I hear good things about you from your publicist."

Manager: 'EXCELLENT promoting Jan! It's another RECORD crowd!'

"We're having company for dinner tonight. Work on some cute remarks."

"Just don't swallow any. What we're wallowing in is Hi-Density Syntha-Soil Fabricated Mud."

'Looks like the milk depot are doing a promotion on fireworks again.'

'This wasn't what I was expecting when they told me they were kicking me upstairs.'

"I'm the result of a one-night-stand my father had with pea-hen."

My other dog is a Great Dane.