Pig Roast Fan Pillows

'That reminds me - we're having a pig roast next Saturday!'

Every barbecue has its winners and losers.

Desert Island BBQ

Hamlet

Non-Humble Pie.

"Over millions of years, carbon turns to diamond. Yet it took dad plus his grill mere minutes to turn last night's marinated chicken into that carbon."

'Our guest tonight certainly needs no introduction.'

'Who would have thought there was a market for it? We're going to be rich George!...'

'I'm working through the Summer as usual: I take my annual leave in Winter you see...'

"That's many giant leaps for man."

'My hamster fell asleep at the wheel!'

'You seem pretty wound up today.'

"They grilled me, Eddie, but I didn't talk."

'I feel much better. I think the cheese treatments must be working.'

"Sorry, I don't work here."

"Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom or night will stop Ed from overcooking the fish."

"Since we're off the grid, Madge does the cooking over a bonfire."

'Remember? It's me, Rick. I used to have the probe attached to my brain...'

'Shtop laughing at my brashesh.'

'I like making pastry. It gets your hands clean.'

Ye Old Mariners Inn.

'Well, if you won't take us to the circus - Can we have a barbeque?'

'Actually, I'm not out foraging, I'm out porridging.'

'Do you have to slurp while you eat?'

'Ofitspray orfay ethay irstfay arterquay?' Find out who wrote this and fire him.

Why hamsters don't sleep at night.

'Why am I always the piggy who crys, 'we-we-we' all the way home?'

'I'll have a BLT sandwich -- hold the 'B'.'

'For the last time, Bobby, finish all your peanuts first... or you may go directly to your room!'

'Don't worry about it - childhood obesity doesn't apply to us'

In front of a jumping silhouette of a deer crossing a road, a deer jumps across a road on a pogo stick.